What Unites Us

What unites us as a family? In 2022, during my talk at the 75th Hagenbuch Reunion, I took a few guesses.

I began with the most obvious thing that we all share: the Hagenbuch name. True, some of us have changed its spelling or taken other names, but we are all linked to the name in some way—and that means something. A few days before this year’s reunion, I was at the playground with my four-year-old son, William. I happened to overhear him conversing with the grandparent of another child there and exclaim, “I’m a Hagenbuch!” The grandparent was confused and didn’t understand what a Hagenbuch was. I stepped in and explained. Clearly William appreciates the significance and personal connection to his last name. Yet, is this really all that unites us?

More fundamental than a name is our mutual DNA or “blood” as my cousin, Mitchell “Mickey” Faus (b. 1950), used to call it. Our blood links us to a common ancestor, Andreas Hagenbuch (b. 1715), and joins us on a biological level. In a previous article, I examined how many of us seek identity through DNA. Also, my father, Mark, has written about our desire to find physical characteristics that are similar between our relatives. Even so, every family contains blood relatives who bear little resemblance to one another. Marriage, adoption, and other important relationships expand the definition of family beyond blood lines too, suggesting that some other factor must bind us to one another as Hagenbuchs.

Sisters: Olivia (Claxton) Beagley and Caroline Claxton

For instance, important events such as weddings, birthdays, and reunions bring us closer together and encourage us to socialize within the same physical space. Then, there is the food we share. A few weeks ago at the 76th Hagenbuch Reunion, everyone took turns to hand-crank six quarts of Grape-nut ice cream. It was certainly one of the highlights of the day and something that people have mentioned was a memorable experience. Can the thing that unites us really be so simple?

Yes and no.

As my father wrote last week, this year’s reunion was one of the best we’ve ever had. There were many reasons for this. But, from my perspective, what made it especially meaningful was the way everyone joined with each other to share their stories. Throughout the day, I talked with relatives I had never met before. For example, one of the first conversations I had was with the children of Steve and April Hagenbuch. They wanted to know how they were related to me. There I stood attempting to recite from memory our family lines in order to demonstrate how we were related. The group was visibly pleased, and I reveled in their delight!

6th cousins once removed: Dale Kretzing and Joe Robb

Later in the day, I spent time talking to their parents, Steve and April. I learned about how April had lived in most of New York City’s five boroughs, along with Steve’s career as a bus driver for Centre County, Pennsylvania. In response, I told tales about our ancestors, including the Hagenbuch brothers Percy (b. 1880) and Clarence (b. 1889). Steve is descended from Percy, while I am descended form Clarence.

Our family is full of stories, and I truly believe these bring us together and ultimately unite us. There are tales about the Hagenbuchs who have come before us—the common history of our family. Some, like the story of Andreas Hagenbuch (b. 1715) who came to America in 1737, pertain to all of us. Others, like how “kissin’ cousins” Andrew Creveling Hagenbuch (b. 1837) and Margaret Alice Hagenbuch (b. 1843) were married, form the cornerstone of a specific family group within our larger tree.

6th cousins: Andrew Hagenbuch and Kirk Swenson

Even more numerous are the personal stories that concern only one or two of us. I heard many of these at the reunion, and each was interesting and valued. For instance, Kirk Swenson, who is descended from Rutter Jeremiah Hagenbuch (b. 1877) explained how the passing of his father inspired him to investigate the Hagenbuch side of his family. Kirk and I spent time talking about this journey. He hopes to learn more about his family through research, and we plan to share his findings in the future. Like my father and I, Kirk believes these stories are worthwhile and define who we are as individuals.

As I wrote this piece, I realized it was yet another article inspired by the recent Hagenbuch Reunion. I promise this will be the last one, at least until we start planning the next reunion in two years! Until then, keep collecting stories about you and your ancestors. These are what unite us as a family, and we look forward to sharing them together.

Family together during the cemetery tour at the 76th Hagenbuch Reunion